Tuesday, 24 March 2015


A guy who wants to remain anonymous for obvious reasons sent in this mail.

Dear Beemee,

I have been living with a woman for some years now, I have a son from a previous relationship, she has 3 girls also from 2 previous relationships, I have nor problem with that,  I think I love her, but fixing a date for our marriage seems to be a problem....I don't want to marry her, I have my reasons.

To be truthful she has been very helpful to me, I am a graduate but since my graduation 7yrs ago I have not been able to secure a job, she on the other hand has a good job and took very good care of me, even helping to send money to my boy's mother for his up keep. She bought a keke napep for me 2yrs ago with this I have become less dependent on her. I am completely and utterly  grateful to her, I know all she needs from me is marriage.

The problem I have with her is that she is very dirty in the home and  does not take adequate care of her kids, they roam about the street  all day long and are always unkempt and very dirty, she leaves their care to  the oldest daughter who is 17 yrs old, the others are 7 and 6yrs old.

I don't want to create problem between us because of them, but she does not discipline the kids, how can I?  I don't want my kids to grow up like this. Please what do I do, should I marry her and hope for the best? I would really love to settle with her if only to say thank you for what she did for me and my family.

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